Ups and Downs

      My life for the past little while has felt like a roller coaster. I'm working on fixing my emotional problems, but it sure is slow going. So, I'll get something taken care of, and I'll feel good for a few days, but then something else will come up to be worked on, and down I'll go again. Last week I didn't write a post because I was so low. Everything had seemed to go wrong, I felt like there was no way I'd ever actually get out of my depression, and I felt that I was literally ruining my children, and to top it off, I'd said something to someone I love very dearly that hurt them. (I'm just glad they forgave me when I apologized and explained how I was feeling, and how that had dictated what I'd said)

My favorite of Jacob's 1-year portraits. With the little belly sticking out, and the finger in the mouth, and that look on his face... TOO CUTE!

     This past week has been better. I've been a little more patient for the most part, and the self-defeating inner voices have been a little quieter. I know that a good portion of that is due to school. I love my school. I seriously cannot even say how much. I know I've said this before, but seriously. I love being able to help people heal themselves. And I'm at the point now where I actually can help other people, not just my fellow classmates. I love helping them to feel love that they've been missing, or helping them to heal beliefs that they've formed about themselves at very young ages that were incorrect (but were the best that those little children could do). Oh, I love it.
     Sorry, I know, I'm just going off. I'll try to stop gushing about it on my blog over and over again. I just... I don't feel like there has been tons else that has been going on. Its been kinda slow around here. Nathaniel has been home due to his short-term disability, and that has been really nice.

I love this one too, because he's got his huge grin, and you can see his teeth, but I find it funny how much he had his finger in his mouth, that actually isn't terribly normal for him.

     Oh! Okay, I know what else to write about. *rolls eyes at self* Nathaniel had his MRI, and we got the results. On the plus side, he doesn't have a torn meniscus. On the downside, we are back at square one, and have no idea what's wrong with his shoulder or knees. (The exercises haven't helped his shoulder at all)  So, now the doctor wants to do a scope. We don't like that idea, so we're also looking at some alternative methods to see if they work, as we set that up. We're hoping that someone can tell us what is going on, and can fix it, without needing to do surgery just to figure it out. (and not even necessarily correct anything)

And, Jessica was dying to be in the pictures, so we got her in one of them, and it was just so cute that I had to buy it.

      And, (doi self) Jacob turned one, and I now have his stats and his pictures (which have been throughout. So, weighing in at 21 pounds 6 ounces, he's in the 25th percentile for weight. At 31 inches tall, he's in the 80th percentile for height. That in and of itself is crazy. His cousin is the same height as him, but is only 6 months old. We'd thought that maybe Jacob was around average, or a little short, while the cousin was tall. (we knew he was tall, because of his family) Nope. Jacob is tall, and his cousin is a giant (in the most loving way possible ;) he's a very cute giant.) And, not surprisingly, his head circumference is 19 inches, putting him in the 90th percentile. Our kids have very big heads. ;)  So yeah, that's it for this week. I'll try to be better about keeping track of what's going on, so I can have better blog posts.